When “you’re amazing” is less about celebrating you and more about recruiting you.

There’s nothing wrong with a compliment, but when you’ve spent enough time around multi-level marketing (MLM), you start to realise that some compliments come with terms and conditions.

Suddenly, someone who hasn’t spoken to you in months is telling you how incredible you are or someone you barely remember from school thinks you’d make an amazing business owner. This is all very nice to hear until you realise there’s an ‘Amazing’ business opportunity lurking somewhere in the conversation.

Here are 10 compliments that might be suspicious…

1. “You’d be amazing at this!”

Apparently, all you need to become a successful entrepreneur is a pulse, a social media account and the ability to copy and paste a motivational quote. No extraordinary business or social skills, just a phone.

2. “I immediately thought of you.”

Of course, it’s possible they actually thought of you because of your unique talents and abilities. It’s also possible they’ve just been told to make a list of 100 people to contact to recruit instead of being identified as someone with great potential.

3. “You have such a big heart.”

This one is particularly effective because nobody wants to believe their kindness is being exploited. Your willingness to support friends and see the best in others is lovely but in the wrong hands, those qualities can be treated less like personality traits and more like sales tools.

4. “You’re a natural people person.”

Translation: You know people, that’s now your potential customer or recruits database sorted. It actually doesn’t matter if you enjoy selling products or recruiting people. You can hold a conversation, so clearly you’re destined for the top of the pyramid-shaped organisational chart.

5. “You deserve financial freedom.”

Most of us would quite like to pay the bills without experiencing a minor existential crisis. This red flag appears when someone’s concern for your financial future conveniently involves you paying them money first. Their version of financial freedom requires you to keep purchasing products, attending events and recruiting others.

6. “You’re too talented to be working for someone else.”

The implication that having a traditional job means wasting your potential. There is nothing wrong with being employed. The important thing is whether the opportunity genuinely works for you, rather than whether someone has convinced you that your current life is somehow inadequate and you are limiting your earning potential.

7. “I love your energy!”

You posted a photograph of yourself enjoying your latte and croissant, and now someone is telling you that your energy is exactly what their team needs. In MLM culture, enthusiasm can be treated as evidence of future success. However, being excited about an ‘opportunity’ and making a sustainable income from it are two entirely different things.

8. “You’re such an inspiration.”

You could be having the worst week of your life, barely holding things together, and someone will still tell you that your positive attitude inspires them. Sometimes people really mean it but at other times, inspirational language becomes a way to keep you performing optimism even when things aren’t going well. Admitting that you’re struggling doesn’t fit neatly into a carefully curated MLM success story.

9. “You’re exactly the kind of person we’re looking for.”

Congratulations! You’ve made it through an extremely exclusive selection process consisting of… being available for a conversation. You might imagine there are rigorous interviews, detailed assessments and a panel of experts evaluating your professional qualifications. It’s worth asking what makes you suitable for the opportunity beyond your willingness to sign up. It’ more that likely someone is just desperate formore people on their team.

10. “I just want to help you succeed”

This is the big one. It sounds supportive that someone believes in you and wants to help you achieve your dreams. Remember that genuine support doesn’t require you to ignore your doubts, spend money you can’t afford or keep going simply because someone else insists that success is just around the corner.

Real encouragement leaves room for questions. It respects your decisions. And it doesn’t disappear the moment you decide the opportunity isn’t for you.

Of course, none of these phrases automatically means someone is trying to recruit you into an MLM. People can be encouraging, and plenty of business owners are legit and believe in what they do. The red flag isn’t just about the compliment itself, It’s the context surrounding it.

Are they interested in you as a person, or does every conversation eventually lead back to the business?

Can you say no without being made to feel that you’re giving up on your dreams? Are you being offered a realistic picture of the costs, risks and likely earnings?

There’s a difference between someone believing in your potential and someone believing your potential could be profitable for them.

Sometimes a compliment is just a compliment. And sometimes it’s a sales pitch wearing a very flattering disguise.

Want to explore the world of MLM culture a little further? My book, Make Memories, Not Downlines, takes a look at the experiences behind the business opportunity.

Written by Siân Alison

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